"Artists use lies to reveal the truth while politicians use lies to hide it."I have always found ways out of problems, and got out no matter how hard things were. I often have condescending attitude towards myself. The more negative I feel about myself, the stronger and more confident I have become.
I wonder if things have started to change, if I am now more of a politician rather than an artist, or if I am truly sure of what, why, how things are suppose to be. I strongly negate myself, all the time, to keep things going. I staunchly criticise myself, sometimes to the point of not accepting my existential reality.
Tonight, is like what it has always been. I am having a thought about what all of this meant to me, about the purpose of living in the present, when I am so certain of the bleak future that I have. I like to see things in their big picture, the long term view upon how things will turn out. A friend suggested me to not think too much about this complex thing.
My brain can't stop working, and invalidate my thoughts. I believe not all things need a reason, nor solution. Just live the life as it is, but only if things were that simple.